She'd been crying. The room was a mess and still smelled of sex, but Javon was long gone. “Hi honey,” I probed. “Are you okay?” She just nodde..., not really looking at me.I sat on the edge of the bed and stroked the curve of her beautiful full hip over the sheet without getting any reaction. “Big news. Looks like I might have to go back east on temporary duty to work at a summer training camp.” She didn't respond at all, but her eyes were open. She was pushing her nose just a little to the side. It was severe enough that I had a different journal about her.07/02/----My purple journal tells everything relating to Carrie and the entire contents is about my “Homosexual urges” except the stuff written in this journal. 08/21/----It is so different to read what I just wrote compared with the stuff I have written about Carrie. Those pages were ripped out of another smaller journal, because I was using it for something else and didn’t want anyone reading it. My letter to Carrie was most of. "I haven't flown in a while and forgot about the bullshit that comes with it. Not to mention I'm kind of on a deadline with my article and have writers block." He peered down and noticed what she was reading. Embarrassed, she closed the magazine. He leaned in and opened to the page again. "It really is a decent article". He put his I.D. next to the bi line and said, "I can make that judgement because I wrote it". She snatched both items out of his hands and examined it. "Oh my God"! she felt. It just tears me up inside. Amy crying has always been particularly upsetting to me, maybe because she does it so seldom. This was several times in the last two months. Poor little thing. I sat down next to her on the bed, took her head and lay it in my lap, and just held her, stroking her hair. Finally, she calmed down a little."Want to tell me about it? A very upset little girl out there doesn't understand why you don't want her to be your sister. Honey, how did we screw up? I honestly.
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