“What, no maple syrup?” Nick jokingly asked.“Shut up and clap.”Nick got comfortable, laying spread eagle on his back, and smiled at the paused...image of his beautiful wife. He clapped once to start the video. Debbie held firm, gently kneading Mr. Twinkie as the show began.“Y’all know what time it is? It’s MILF o’clock, you raunchy little cocksuckers. Time to pony up.”As the camera panned away from his wife, Nick prepared himself. He saw eight naked elves dressed as reindeer, wearing bells around. Her distorted breasts hung from her to about six inches above the flat surface.Sickened, Kathy closed her eyes, tears forming in them.Hearing a voice Kathy open her eyes, another pair of eyes looked back at her, eyes belonging to the disfigured woman in front of her."Are you alive?" it asked."Yes," Kathy stammered."I'm so sorry to see you here even though it's good to hear another voice," It said, "My name is Megan, Meg for short, what is your name?" Kathy, what have they done to you?"Tears. But now we have complete trust with each other and that really seems to really help and make a difference."I wish I could have thought of something else clever to use as a leaving line, but I couldn't think of anything worthwhile, so I just said "Ok, fine." and left.Now I was really sure there was something going on man speak vs. women speak that I wasn't comprehending. Under other circumstances, it would have been Myra I would have asked to get a proper female to male translation, this wasn't. He had been chosen as the poor sucker to start the ball rolling. Before he left for the States he had been at a pre-Christmas drinks at friends when Sarah had sidled up to him, sliding her arm around his waist and in her usual forceful manner invited him, no told him, that she wouldn’t take no for an answer, but he was to come to her for supper the night he flew back from visiting his family, so he didn’t have to starve, or get a take away that night. Bone weary, the plane landing an hour late,.
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