”“No, really! If you didn’t want to, we don’t. Simple as that.”“Would you want to otherwise?”“Maybe. Does the thought of screwing Caro... or somebody else make me hard? Sure. So what? If you don’t want to, I don’t want to. The thought of screwing you makes me hard, too.” I stood and leaned against the counter. “What about you? Do you want to fuck Jerry or anybody else?”“Maybe. I suppose it’s a fantasy.”I refilled my coffee cup. “Listen, if you want, we can go. If you feel uncomfortable, we make. I've got all that. Ask me where or how to touch a woman, and I'm all thumbs." Andraste's Flaming Sword, Alistair! Alright, listen. There are things ... if you want, I could ... try to teach you. Don't give me that look, I'm not suggesting we sleep together! I can explain to you, if we have some parchment I'll even draw some pictures. At least it might give you some confidence! The best, really, would be to show you on someone else, but that isn't going to happen for either of us."They talked. The mom asks, “Why on earth do you need that?”The little boy replies, “isn’t that what you give daddy when HIS shit won’t get hard?!”This compliments of Mario MComplaints to wife and replyTo My Dearest Wife,During the past year, I have attempted to make love to you 365 times. I have succeeded 36 times, which is an average of only once every 10 days. The following is a list of why I didn’t succeed more often:We will wake the kids - 54 timesIt’s too late - 15 timesI’m too tired - 42 timesIt’s too. " You have to take a shot some time." Then they went back to working on lunch. Talking about other topics. I stayed where I was for another ten minutes then got my nerve up, stood and joined them in the kitchen. I stood by the open fourth seat and first asked if Kristy was ok, if she needed anything for the sunburn."I'm ok, thanks. Just dumb to stay out too long. I should know better. Want any lunch?" No thanks. I uh, I want to apologize to you guys if I was too forward last night". I looked.
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